The Bile Canaliculi w/ Hamms & Wine

“Now, why is the stomach surrounded by the liver? Is it in order that the liver may warm it and it may in turn warm the food? This is indeed the very reason why it is closely clasped by the lobes of the liver, as if by fingers.” — Galen, ca. 200 A.D

Not much got past old Galen, and this is no exception. The liver does indeed surround the stomach. The stomach is where food goes. But what have we learned since Galen schooled the world on the warm gooey tasty organ? Do we still only appreciate the liver for its ability to soothe our food into a warm poo?

I will answer this question through a series of riddles, each more devious and cryptic that the one before. In my experience, that is the best way to explain things.

Riddle # 1
For the love
of thee bovine
I lay in woe
I sip my wine
but when grandpa death
knocks on thy door
tis this organ I abhor.

Explanation # 1 – I bet you thought the riddle has something to do with the liver metabolizing ethanol. Nope. Cows don’t drink alcohol. This riddle is through the viewpoint of a cow and the wine they are sipping is meant to be symbolic. The cow is really depressed because there was a bull that didn’t notice them so the cow was comfort eating some fatty foods and all the fat was metabolized by the liver. The cow got hepatic lipidosis and died. We now know that the liver metabolizes fat, but if it gets too much it sucks at it.

Riddle #2
Fell from over under throws
The caper stones whining to and fro
Through central ducts
The shit goes quick
It’s quick as fuck
But where it goes
we do not know
But now we do
from science books

Explanation #2 – Yea this one is a bit harder I know. Let me break it down. The falling refers to the draining of the veins from the digestive tract. All the blood from the digestive tract empties into the liver through a big vein called the “Portal Vein.” The caper stones it refers to are the oxygenated red blood cells which also empty into the liver through the hepatic artery. The whining to and fro is because they get all mixed when they enter the liver lobules through the hepatic triad. They empty into the central veins at the center of the lobules. It’s not super fast like the riddle, thats just a little embellishing to make it exciting. It goes at normal blood pace. All the science books tell us that stuff.

Riddle #3
From chamber tombs
to emporeress wombs
the fire for
burrito booms
and once duodenal
this fire takes
these chamber wombs
the water breaks
and with this water
flowing free
unwrap burrito
fed to me

Explanation #3 – Alright, I do admit that this one is pretty cryptic. Maybe too cryptic. But encapsulated in this is one of the greatest messages of all. Knowledge. The chamber tombs are just the parenchymal cells of the liver which make up the sinusoids of the lobules. While the sinusoids empty into the central vein like riddle #2 showed us, the cells themselves are connected by emporeress wombs. These are bile canaliculi that connect the cells through tight junctions and allow for the flow of bile to the draining bile duct of the portal triad. The “fire for the burrito booms” is the bile being released to help digest the fatty burrito. That’s why it gets released and unwraps the fat from the burrito by helping dissolve it in the duodenum. This fat forms chylomicrons in the intestinal lumen cells which makes its way into blood and lymph to get distributed through the body.

In summary, we have learned a lot since the days of Galen, but we are still indebted to him for getting the ball rolling and providing the initial insight that showed that the liver is definitely a real must.

This was written under the guidance of Hamms beer and Bota Box Cab Sav.


One thought on “The Bile Canaliculi w/ Hamms & Wine

  1. Welcome! Welcome! Welcome! To an evening of exciting quarter-mile action!
    Our first race is a benefit for daredevil Lance Murdock!
    Who’s hospitalized with cirrhosis of the liver!

    ….All right! Liver!


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